Tyler Said What?

I have kept track of some of the things my Grandchildren have said to me over the years. Tyler Wick was born 2003:

_____Date_____ They Said What?
2 0 0 6
Age 3
September 14, 2006 Tyler wanted a bite of his brother’s candy because he said it is so ‘tasty’.
September 15, 2006 Tyler reached up to play with the reindeer Pernilla had given us from Lapland and Deb told him not to touch. Tyler was fascinated by the bell that hung from the reindeers neck. He said, "That deer has a doorbell on it".
September 16, 2006 Tyler saw Chandra was sunburned and he told her she wouldn't get sunburned if she used sunblock. (6/27/12 The darn girl is still getting sunburned. Come on, nurse Chandra. You've just got to know better by now!)
2 0 0 7
January 28, 2007 Colton and Tyler were taking turns playing chase. Every time Tyler got discouraged, he would say he didn't want to play anymore. Colton could be heard to say, "Tickle, tickle, tickle. Where's that smile? Come on. Where's that smile? There it is." Then he'd say, "Okay, come chase me!" The amazing this was, this occurred several times and it worked every single time.
Age 4
September 9, 2007 I fixed spaghetti and to the household I hollered that food was "on" if anybody wanted some. Tyler said, "I don't like food on."
October 15, 2007 Debbie told Colton (5) and Tyler (4) if they did not behave she was going to put them in her doghouse and then they both started insisting she put them in her doghouse and wanted to know where it was, etc. She had a hard time getting them to understand what and where her fictional doghouse really was.
November 25, 2007 Brenna had been playing hide and seek with Colton and Tyler when she caught them she would "gobble them up." Yum . . . yum . . . yum . . . Well, after a late lunch at 3:00 p.m., Brenna told everyone she was so full and so stuffed, she couldn't eat any more. Then piped up, "Then you don't need to eat us anymore."
November 25, 2007 Colton was correcting Tyler on his pronunciation of Jack Frost telling Tyler it was "Jack Frosting. Frosting—NOT Frost."
December 2007 Colton and Tyler were in their coats. I told them to take their "clothes" off so we could eat. Tyler asked, "Why do we have to eat with our clothes off?" Oops. Not a mind reader. We all know what I really meant.
December 15, 2007 Colton, Tyler and I were playing "I see something…" and for Tyler's turn I watched him look at the tree and could tell that the "something white going up and down was the beaded garland. So my guess was "beads." He said "no." Then Colton said, "necklace." Tyler said, "That's right! You're the winner! Now it's your turn" Man we are talking about some really loooooooooooong-necked women here!
2 0 0 8
January 19, 2008 Tyler was looking at the rat's cage (Cody's hairless rat) and asking questions and I was answering. Next, we talked about the rat cleaning itself and Tyler was showing me how the rat was doing this when I mentioned the rat got a bath in the sink just like Tyler when he was a baby and Tyler asked, "when I was a rat?"
January 19, 2008 Tyler said Teri's "black feet cry." I have NO idea what he meant.
April 3, 2008 Cody and Tyler were watching the Jimmy Neutron movie. At one point a very familiar tune was heard and Tyler informed us the outer space aliens were making all the children's parents so do the "The Chicken Dance." Tyler said, "See, they are all moving like ducks." Okaaaaaaaaaay
April 3, 2008 Chandra purchased a trampoline and set it up in the back yard this weekend. Colton got into trouble at school and to make sure he got the lesson, I picked up Tyler and took him to my house so he could jump on the trampoline while Colton sat at home and wrote sentences.

At the house, Cody was real excited about jumping on the trampoline with Tyler but he kept knocking him down on purpose, using "TV wrestling" moves like a loose version of the "clothesline" etc. I told Cody he better stop that before Tyler got frustrated. Every time Tyler would "try" to get up, Cody would put him back down. Not much fun for anyone but Cody. Anyway . . . Cody pretty much ignored me and before long Tyler, trying to get up from his supine position on the trampoline, told Cody to "stop it" because he has making Tyler "frus and station." Okaaaaaaaaaay
May 21, 2008 Both of my darling boy-o's decided they wanted to wake up early this morning. I woke up to them standing over me. (Two dark figures in front of you… always something you want to see in the dark… lol.)

Well, I told them if they wanted to be up that early, they would have to stay quiet and let mommy get ready for work. So I got them some books out and set them up in the living room, reminding them to be quiet because daddy was sleeping. After a while I noticed that it was a little too quiet… so I went out to investigate. When I was getting closer to the living room I heard some whispering and figured they were doing something they shouldn't, ya know? Well, I came around to the door in the bar area, so I could come in behind them. I saw two little dark heads bent together on the couch. A few steps closer and I saw that Tyler was snuggled up next to Colton… they were both sitting there nice and quiet… and Colton was reading a book to Tyler as quietly as he could. Was the cutest darn thing I've seen in a while. I almost cried it was so cute.
June 18, 2008 Tyler was wanting more to drink after having had plenty…I told him no…so he came in a few minutes later and told me his tummy hurt so he needed a drink. Made me think of Chandra and the cheese.
June 25, 2008 Did I tell you about giving Colton and Tyler a real close haircut a couple of weeks ago? Leticia and I kept telling him (Tyler) how handsome he looked. Well, he sure enjoyed looking in the bathroom mirror approving it and darned if on Monday he didn't pop into his daycare center and pipe out "LOOK HOW HANDSOME I AM!"

Funny (NOT) this is; with Tyler it is a real tough battle to give him a haircut at all. It's a horrible experience for all. He turtles his head down as far into his shoulders as possible. Tilts his head on the side you are trying to work on so you can't cut anything because his head is on his shoulder or too close to get the electric razor in there. He screams, cries, and squirms horribly. Before you're done he will most likely be pinned to the floor held down by 2 large adults.

Ideas fly fast and furious and there is NO solution to the problem. I am disgusted. This CANNOT continue! I thought it was the electric razor (which was the ancient one I used on Derek when he was small), so I purchased a brand new one. Not the solution. Or, perhaps, it was the darn vibration just really upsets him so much he literally could not stand it. So, I just went back to the way I did with Derek for a long time when he was a real young tot; just using my fingers and hair clippers/scissors. This is a loooooooooooooong process, but Tyler actually sits still for this. Then I used a lady Bic disposable razor on his neck. The first time I did this it was a flaming success. However, the second time I did this he had become so hot as the temperatures began rising under the apron I decided to go ahead and see if I could get away with the electric razor this time. Well, he definitely did NOT like it, but he did NOT turtle on me and although his body language was signaling he was just about to lose it, we finished the job.

Yes, he soaked up the praise and was so tickled when he next saw me the following weekend he touched the back of his neck with his fingers and told me his hair was getting long and he thought he needed a haircut. What?!??
Age 5
November 23, 2008 Funny in church today. We sit over on the left side of the church by the statue of Mary up on the wall with the vase of flowers on it. If you notice, she has her hands extended before her like she is welcoming a child or her childern. Tyler looked at it and said "Mary is picking flowers." Also, in church, in the book we use had two "II" after a word. Tyler pointed to it and said it said "Pause." If you notice on your computer and CD players and remotes the two hatch marks side by side are the symbols you press to "pause" something. Never entered my mind that it was anything other than "the second."
2 0 0 9
February 6, 2009 Tyler emptied my bottle of liquid soap into the bathroom sink and proceeded to fill it full of bubbles. In the meantime, I kept telling him from the kitchen that he needed to turn off the water. Finally, I went in and found him with the empty bottle and bubbles higher than his need. He got a lecture from me about washing water and I let him know I was angry with him. I went back to supper preparation and could hear small sobs and growls coming from the bathroom. Puzzled, I went in to investigate and yes, he was growling and very angry with me. I walked up to him and he looked up at me and said, "I hate you." That was a surprise. Anyway, I explained that I loved him always no matter if he was doing something good or doing something bad… lecture, lecture, lecture and after I left he finished cleaning up, then came out, and wrote me the note below.
Age 6
June 29, 2009 Pressed for time getting Tyler to vacation bible school, I swung by McDonald's to get 2 hamburgers. Tyler said he didn't like hamburgers, only cheeseburgers. Then he promptly told me he wanted a "cheeseburger with no cheese and ketchup only."
June 29, 2009 On the way to McDonald's to get a bite before vacation bible school, Tyler told me he lost his new sandals in the car. I replied, "Oh, no! Your mom is going to be sooo upset with me for losing your new sandals in my car." He guffawed and said, "I can't believe you fell for tat! Ad he must have thought I was such a gullible soul that he tried it on me again. Silly old Nana repeated her lines just right so he could guffaw again and chortle, "I can't believe you fell for that."
September 19, 2009 Leticia drew some cougars for Cody's football team's fan's shirts. Colton saw them and said he didn't know the public was going to be wearing them. He said, "My mother drew those." Tyler piped in "How come there's a panther on their shirts?" (Went originally from 8 colors down to 4. Certainly made a difference in the presentation but was still a fine piece of artwork.) Way to go, Leticia.
October 19, 2009 Colton and Tyler were talking about where Galon lived and Colton said, "I bet he only goes to Arlington Park (ball field). Tyler said, "Huh unh. Galon doesn't go to any forest." Colton trying to explain started singing "Take Me Out to the Ballgame." Still went right over his head. Oh, well…
November 8, 2009 Colton will be starting to study "ento-" on Monday. Tyler wants to "ology" too.
2 0 1 0
Age 7
October 1, 2010 Colton and Tyler were watching Wonder Pets on TV with Daniel and Hunter. The Wonder Pets are a baby turtle, baby guinea pig, and baby duck. They were trying to help a baby elephant get its trunk unstuck from the mud. Tyler said, "They’re too little. They could probably do it if they had a dog." What? You are joking right, Tyler?
October 23, 2010 Tyler saw the Texas Rangers playing the San Francisco Giants and asked how they knew to speak English?
2 0 1 1
February 26, 2011 Tyler asking back-to-back "Why" questions. Frazzled Me: "Why are you asking so many questions!" Super smooth Tyler: "I'm just a kid that likes to ask questions... and pie." Hahaha
July 2, 2011 Tyler said he was going to take wine at mass. I told him that I just wet my lips and licked them, made the sign of the cross, and said amen. Tyler said he took a small gulp because he needed more because he got into things.
Age 8
December 30, 2011 Tyler was causing a ruckus so I called him into the kitchen to "redirect" him. I needed his "help." I had him get a sharp knife and as I held the HOT baked potatoes still, he sliced them length-wise with the knife. When his mommy came home he very proudly said, "I helped Nana make dinner!"
2 0 1 2
January 3, 2012 Tyler likes to slowly turn up the TV volume to full blast every time he can manage it. I am always having to go in and turn it down from blaring to tolerable. Like just now:

Me: Where is the remote for the TV? (After looking all over the living room)
Me: Tyler?
Tyler: (Looks hesitant for a moment) It's in the bathroom.
Me: Why’s it in the bathroom?
Tyler: 'Cuz I knew you wouldn’t look there.

Me: O_o
July 1, 2012 Tyler asked me how come the priest spoke so slowly during mass. I told him because he was older than Nannie and Pops. He asked, "Combined?" Anwered, "No, Tyler." I mean combined would be 162. No, I really don’t think so, Tyler.
Age 9

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